Baby Buzz

For New Moms & Expectant Moms

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Getting into the Groove...

Posted on 4/15/2009 by Denise

For the first couple of weeks with our new baby, Judah, I was lucky to have tons of help from family, friends, and co-workers.  For the first week, my mom stayed during the day and helped out and cooked meals.  My grandma also came for a few days.  On the second week, my in-laws came in from out of town and stayed nearly the whole week and helped out playing with the baby while I got some sleep!  My principal at the primary school where I work made dinner for us one night, and my fellow co-workers had dinner sent to us another night. 

Even with all the help, by the third and fourth week I was wiped out.  By then my husband had returned to work (the second week) and I was left alone to figure out how to care for that little one all day and all night.  I thought I would never figure out this baby business!  I also longed for a night when I could sleep through the night without being woken up numerous times, feeding and rocking, feeding and rocking!  I was beginning to wonder if I was really cut out for this!

If you are a new mom, or expecting your first, let me assure you there will be days, nights, weeks even, when you are ready to give up.  But, eventually you will get the hang of it and the baby will find his groove as well.  It is week six for us and I am amazed that we already have some semblance of a schedule.  The baby definitely has found his pattern.  I am even more amazed that what I was stressing out about (thinking I would never be able to get this baby to stop crying) I finally figured out!  It is like I know exactly what his cries mean and I know exactly what he needs.  I’ve even figured out a few tricks for when he is inconsolable.  For example, when he is really upset in the evening I can put him in the bath tub and he immediately starts splashing and cooing.  Or, when he starts to wake up I can pat his back and he drifts right back to sleep.  And, my favorite, when he wakes up in the middle of the night – WIDE AWAKE – I can place him on my chest and he’ll snuggle right up and sleep another three hours (instead of having to get up and rock him when I feel like a zombie!).

It is amazing how much that little baby will change in just a few weeks and it is even more amazing that you can become a GOOD mommy almost instinctively in that same, short amount of time.  I never knew I could love another human as much as this little one.  My favorite part so far… he smiled at me and melted my heart!
 

Comments
13 Comments
  • Denise - I just wanted to tell you I am a mother of 2 boys - my oldest will be 3 in September and our baby is 10 months. When my first one was born I thought I had this entire thing together. But when we were pregnant for the second time I worried constantly the last three months about my oldest - it was soooo unnecessary they are the best of friends now. When I had my second my first one had been sleeping through the night for almost a year. . .we rarely have a night where one or both aren't awake more than once! I may get a uninterrupted nights sleep when they are 18! But I think you go through periods where you worry and no matter what it's all going to work out! :)

    April on 5/12/2009 at 10:37 AM
  • Good Morning, This is my first time doing this, so bare with me. I'm 42 yrs old and just had my first baby last year. The only time I would get heartburn was at 2:00 every morning. A friend of mine told to drink milk and it would to subside it. Another friend who is much younger than I and who's baby is 23 days older than mine found alot of really nice things on ebay-cheap, so check there. Thanks for reading. Hope you receive this.

    Lucy Miller on 5/11/2009 at 10:48 AM
  • This bloque really helped me in deciding whether or not having family members in the first days of having my baby at home. I feared that maybe they are going to want to take away my time of connecting with my baby, but I guess I'll be needing the break now and then when the baby arrives. Im glad I will be having that support from my Mother and sister because Im pretty sure now that Im going to need it! Thanks!

    Z on 5/8/2009 at 8:52 AM
  • I had similar help from my family and I am really lucky that my mom has been able to help me so much... my husband and I were never around babies much so I figured all the screaming was normal, my mom figured out he was having some problem cause she said he should be sleeping more, I don't wish my experience on anyone, not even a worst enemy... he screamed for 7 months straight, straight, just now at 8 months he has begun to be happy some times, he still is up ALL night long and never has adjusted to a good schedule... I love being a mom but I don't think I want more than one baby... I cannot imagine having a toddler plus what this baby has gone through, I'd go insain...

    Rachel on 5/3/2009 at 9:35 AM
  • I love you and your baby belly too!

    Lindsey Galvin on 5/2/2009 at 2:19 AM
  • How was your sleep during the heat? Did you try the dill pickle trick when you noticed the on set of heartburn? Are you increasing your filtered water intake during the warm to hot days,and going caffeine free and no white sugar or corn based sweetner?

    Patrick on 4/26/2009 at 11:59 PM
  • Thanks for the advise there are so many people who dont know what to do. My husband and i adopted our first 9 months ago. There were times when i really worried if i were cut out for this (especially when she went through colic...i thought i was gonna die) If there is anything i can tell you new mommies, its dont worry about things and dont take it so serously just yet. So what if your baby wants you to hold him/her a lot or if they like to sleep with you. My baby did all these things and it made my life so much easier, and now that she is bigger she has developed her own way without me forcing a schedule or my way onto her.

    Tarah on 4/22/2009 at 6:31 PM
  • My baby is 4 weeks old today. I know it's probably gonna get me later because she will expect it but every minute (or close to it) of every day I'm holding my precious baby girl because I'm afraid I'll miss so much of it when I go back to work next week. If you are able to stay home with your little one then that is great, I wish that I could. But don't take for granted the times when he is comforted by you and only you--rocking him to sleep or letting him snuggle on your chest...these are the times when he is going to need you most in his life. Take advantage of it now, one day you're going to wish that you could go back to this--even with all the lack of sleep and stress these are some of the best times you'll have with your newborn. Where you can just be with him and hold him all you want without his imput haha. I'm sure you're doing great. And a little piece of advice I found helpful as well as a new mother--sleep when he sleeps during the day. Don't worry about cleaning or anything else just yet, that can come later. You need to take care of you before you take care of your house. Best of luck and congrats on your baby boy!

    Stephanie on 4/21/2009 at 8:40 AM
  • Thanks for sharing your experience! We had our first child 6 weeks ago, and like you had tons of help. Now my husband is back at work, and I find myself getting frustrated more at night. I ask myself everyday if I'm gonna make it! There are still a lot of "I don't knows". I guess this is a part of every new mother, I just never realized how hard it could be. You are so right, I never thought I could have so much love for her! Being a mother is the greatest blessing ever!!

    Crystal Buchanan on 4/20/2009 at 3:26 PM
  • My children are grown now, but I was very fortunate to be able to stay home when they were born. My husband and I looked at it this way: Will the kids remember that they had $500 book cases in their rooms or will they remember that their mom was home with them when they were growing up?? Without a doubt, they remember that I was able to be home when they were growing up. There are many, many ways to figure how how to be able to stay home. If it means driving a used car, do it!! If it means shopping in the generic aisle, do it. You will be surprised at how many ways you can save. Heck, I looked at it this way - how much is it costing you to go to work?? Add up the cost of child care, if you don't have family to help, the cost of gas, to get to work, the cost of clothing, etc. Just the cost of working can diminish what you are able to take home.

    Sue on 4/18/2009 at 11:25 AM
  • Its great to see a popular store promoting cloth. We have been cloth diapering since my son was born 5 months ago. We have pocket diapers and fitted. Its great to hear your story.

    Cherie on 4/17/2009 at 10:15 PM
  • Please be encouraged! I feel certain that you are a WONDERFUL mommy! The fact that you care about all of these "little" things places you in that category. My baby is now 5 months old, and i promise you that it does get easier and easier. They get more adjusted to being in our world, and we get more adjusted to all of their ideosyncracies and rhythms. Plus...your body heals up after the stress of pregnancy and labor and delivery! Honestly, as much as you can, cherish this time when he is "little", and you can give him a bath and rock him to sleep. He will spend the rest of his life getting more and more independent, (as he should to be healthy!) My grandmother always said, "Do today what you cannot go back and do tomorrow". You can always clean your house, paint your toenails, go shopping :), etc., BUT you cannot always go back and rock that baby when he is out of sorts!

    Jenny on 4/15/2009 at 3:31 PM
  • Any idea where I can order baby bed parts from????

    Brittany on 4/15/2009 at 3:09 PM
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